Thursday, October 16, 2008

La Cañada ValleyAround Town: Sun: Top 10 symptoms of the Manny Effect

The Manny Effect is like the Bush Doctrine. Impossible to define, but we all understand it.

Or so we think.

Like the Bush Doctrine, the Manny Effect is bane of East Coast journalists. In particular, it makes East Coast sportswriters even grumpier and causes their biting dismissal of Angelenos as lacking baseball sophistication. As if! Just when Dodger baseball is the existential core of post-meltdown Los Angeles.

There is a liminal moment when one is poised between “infected” and “not exactly sure.”

To help, here’s a list of the top 10 symptoms that you have succumbed to the Manny Effect and its corollary, Russell Martin Mania.

10. You have used the phrase “Mannywood” in a sentence.

9. You wonder why those mean pitchers keep hitting Russell Martin.

8. Your newest bumper sticker says, “Vaya con el Manny!”

7. You send weekly e-mails to Plashke. Whether he needs them or not.

6. You give up for

5. You skip the city council meetings when the Dodgers are in town.

4. At cocktail parties in the 91011, you’ve stopped talking about sewers. It’s Dodgers. Dodgers. Dodgers.

3. You write letters to the editor explaining that the catcher is more important than the pitchers.

2. You steal your child’s mitt. You take it to Dodger games.

1. The dreadlock wig. The new hat. The shirt with 99 or 55 on it.

In conclusion, always remember this: The devil once challenged God to a baseball game. Naturally, God accepted, saying, “You don’t have a chance. My team will have Jackie Robinson, Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle and Bobby Bonds.”

“Ha!” the devil sneered, “I have all the umpires!”


ANITA SUSAN BRENNER is a local resident and a trial attorney with Law Offices of Torres & Brenner in Pasadena.

La Cañada Valley Sun: La Cañada Flintridge, CaliforniaPublished Thursday, October 16, 2008 4:12 AM PDT

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